There are so many different stages to our children growing up. I remember when the 4 oldest were in the toddlers ages, I longed for the days when they were older and able to do so much more independently. Now that they are older, I long for the days when they were toddlers. Life is funny that way. I wish that when I am in ANY stage of thier life, I would just enjoy it. Each stage is a wonder. Each stage brings new and exciting things while at the same time, it lets go of things I cherished about that stage It is bitter sweet.

My girls are growing up much quicker then I would like. I'm not one of those parents who are looking forward to the day they leave.... in fact, I dread that day. But, it is coming. I am trying to prepare myself and trying to allow the reigns to be loosened a little bit at a time. I want them to learn and let go slowly.... but still be able to let go when the time comes.

But as I let the reigns out, slowly, it is hard. Not so much because I can't trust them... I can. They are awesome kids; it is life that I don't trust. It is the things that they do not expect to come at them, the emotions, the feelings, the longings, the desires, the hopes and dreams... all of the things that can pull a great kid off the path of righteousness. It is the others in the world who do hold to the truths of the Word of God. It is life. It is those things that make it hard to let go.

THe girls have reached high school years. They are years that are full of memories for me. I want both of the girls to experience wonderful memories. But in wanting them to experience them, it means letting go of the time I have with them. That is the hard part. I feel like I never see them anymore. They are safe, our life is chaotic, and memories are being made. Letting go and loosenign reigns hurts in more ways then I thought would hurt. I miss my girls, but I love them experiencing things. I want to let go a little at a time yet I want to hold on tighter then ever. Life is sure strange.